This Is My Story
by GSRFAN91
Summary: Sometimes it's hard to pretend that you feel normal inside. But when you have your soul mate beside you through all life's hard choices, somehow you can make it through. GSR.


A/N- I'm Back ha-ha! :D So this story popped into my head after me and Louise was thinking of continuing with our joined writing. I have the next few weeks to spare so hopefully I be tying up all my stories and also me and Louise are going to finish our joined stories. Please R & R :o)

**This is my story.**

_Sometimes it's hard to pretend that you feel normal inside. But when you have your soul mate beside you through all life's hard choices, somehow you can make it through._

Hi my name is Sara and this is my story.

Since I can remember my family wasn't the loving caring type you would see on TV shows such as the Brady bunch. No. My family was all about tough love, if you loved someone you would show it with a smack or a kick. Well that's what I told myself.

The first time I experienced this tough love I was 7. I remember I came home with the spelling test paper in my hand. I couldn't wait to show my mom and dad that I passed all the questions. I thought they would be proud, my mom was, but the reward she gave me was an ice pack to my face after I came face to face with my dad's fist. To this day I still have no idea why he hit me. After that I learned never to show how well I done in school to my father, because the reward was totally different to what the other children got.

I learned that all families weren't the same as mine when I was 9. My best and only friend Leigh Ann invited me to her birthday party…I begged and begged my dad to let me go, and every time I asked he would give me a smack.

The day of the party came and I thought I wouldn't be attending. But when I arrived home from school, my dad wasn't home, my mom lied saying he was working late…it was only when I was older that I found out he was in a cell sobering up after a drunken fight in his local bar.

Realising her husband won't be home to hurt me or herself, she drove me to Leigh Ann's party. It took me a moment to realise this is how my parties should be like. Balloons in all corners of the rooms, a big table filled with cakes, biscuits sandwiches, and presents stacked high in the corner of the front room.

My parties included me my brother, mom and dad sat around our small kitchen table eating take out, and me having two presents to open one of my mom and one of my older brother., I didn't get them until my father passed out on the sofa with all the alcohol he would drink. I learned why, when he broke the glass cross my mother bought me when I was 5. Saying I wasn't worthy of anything besides a slap.

My brother committed suicide when I was 11. My father the cheap scum of the earth, had him cremated because it was the cheaper option…my mother wished she had a grave for her only son so she could visit him when times got tough. The reason why Michael killed himself? My father didn't give a care in the world for him and for a 15 year old boy to know he isn't wanted in his own home, gives you great pain. The pain I experienced of how my brother left me in this rotten world was buried deep down. My dad wouldn't let me grief or my mother.

After that incident my mother turned to alcohol. I begged her not to do it, I tried to explain it's the drink what makes my father the way he is but she wouldn't listen. So every night after that she would sit in her room and drink wine and vodka to get rid of all the pain and grief she was feeling. That's when I learned to provide myself with all the necessities. My mom never had any money for shopping. Her money would feed her drinking habit and my father's money would feed his alcohol addiction. I had to get a job at the local newsagents at 12 years old, just to keep myself alive.

It was one night after I finished closing the shop up, I walked the small distant back home. I noticed ambulance and half a dozen police cars parked outside our apartment block, as naïve as I where I thought something happened to poor old Peggy Watts who lived in the apartment next door, but walking along the hallway to what was my home I saw two policemen standing at either side of the door. I walked up to them and politely asked if I could go in, the oldest of the men looked at me with sympathy. He probably saw the resemblances between me and my mother and realised I was their child. Shortly after that, I saw a body bag exiting my home, and my mother in handcuffs walking behind it, tears etched along her sunken cheeks, blood soaked in her cotton nightdress, her hands covered in blood. She gave me a somewhat of a satisfied look and smiled before waving her handcuffed hand. I realised after when the nice policeman explained what happened that my mom was happy she finally got rid of my father. And somewhere inside me I was happy there was going to be no beating, no drunken arguments.

That feeling went away when I was put in foster care, I wasn't aloud to see my mom, and the only time I have saw her was at the graveside of my father funeral. That made me sick, the thought of how evil my father was. He had life insurance for him to have a nice funeral, with a casket and marble headstone, when my poor brother didn't get anything. That was when I finally let go of my family. I wasn't aloud to see my mom till I left foster care at age 18 and even then I didn't want too, I threw myself into college work and by the time my mom crossed my mind again I was at university 100 miles away from where she was kept.

That's when I met my true soul mate. I was a little over 20 and attending a crime forensic conference, I had no intention of going to the seminar seeing as I had already learned what the teacher would be teaching but with a bit of persuasion from my only friend in university Tara, I decided to go. Sitting at the front of the hall I was the first one to notice him, I saw him poking his head from round the door to see how many people had attended. Seeing him scan the room I decided to check and see if any people did turn up, noticing there was only a couple of dozen people in the hall that could hold 200 I looked back at him in a sort of sympathy but seeing his face go calm I realised he was actually happy they wasn't so many people there.

Dr Gilbert Grissom. I actually could have looked at him all day. It took all my power to concentrate on what he was saying than how he would lick his lips when excited about something.

The seminar passed quicker than I would liked it to, Even after all the students walked away scratching their heads about the stuff they had heard today I was still glued to my seat watching him, the notes I managed to write was lay in front of me.

When he realised I was still there watching him he smiled, a skip a heartbeat crooked smile. That's the moment I actually thought of love at first sight being true.

I managed to attend all the seminars Dr Grissom was teaching within the next week. We talked like old friends and for once in my whole life I forgot about the past. It was when he asked me out for dinner on his last night in San Francisco that I knew he liked me too. But with him being 20 years my senior I didn't know if I should risk it, I didn't know if he would risk it.

But my hopes were demolished. He didn't say a word of if they would be any us. But he did leave me his email address and number, for me to get in contact with him anytime.

We did keep in contact but not as much as I would have liked, his worked kept him busy for months at a time, while my university work was dull and easy.

The phone call I got not long after I started working in San Francisco crime lab changed my life forever.

Grissom need my help. Some case was getting to him and a colleague had been suspended and he needed help.

It didn't take me long to grab the next plane out, and within a day I was standing behind the man I loved from the first moment I set eyes on him.

From then on I stayed in Las Vegas. I became a level 2 CSI and befriended some of the most descent people you will ever meet.

Nick Stokes is the brother I could have had, if mine didn't end his life. He looks after me through everything, protects me like any older brother would, When he was kidnapped a few years ago now, I thought I was going to lose someone I loved all over again, if anything did happen to him like that I think I would have broken down completely.

Warrick Brown is a very good friend, it took a while when I first started working at Las Vegas crime lab to trust him. I have my reasons with what was happened when Grissom called me. But I guess I kind of weirdly owe it to Warrick for bringing me here for everything I have become and everything I have.

Greg Sanders the only guy who actually shows you he likes you. He is like a younger brother to me. He is so lively and happy most of the time it's great to have him as a friend. It wasn't long ago he got beat up pretty badly of some gang. Bless him he was more worried about the guy he hurt then himself. That is Greg, one of the selfless guys you would ever find in Sin city.

Catherine Willows, well she can be so stubborn bitchy, etc, but somehow we have become the best of friends. She has helped me with much needed advice. If it wasn't for her maybe I wouldn't have to courage to be where I am today.

Jim Brass, The father I never had. I'm glad I had the chance to meet him; he is a one of a kind, wherever you are or whatever you do, and you can count on him to be there for you anytime.

Gilbert Grissom. My darling Grissom. It has been an awfully rocky road with me and him. He pushed me away for 6 years, I knew somewhere deep inside he loved me; I guess he couldn't get out of the routine of being the man with no feelings. For a while I thought he would never come out of his shell but I guess I was wrong. The day he came to see how I was after I was suspended was the start of a new road to us both. He comforted me whilst I blurted out all of my deepest darkest burdens. He helped me get through them one by one. He helped me become who I am today a happier healthier person.

It wasn't long till things went all wrong again; I was kidnapped though I don't really want to go into details as I have just recently buried the painful experience. Grissom according to the team was distraught, Natalie who kidnapped me was out to get Gil So to this day he still thinks it was his fault no matter how many times I say it isn't.

After that dreadful experience I wasn't myself anymore. Even though I had Grissom to hold me and care for me I just felt like an empty shell. Things came back from the past and in the end it got way too much to burden, that was when I broke Gil's heart. I regret what I did in someway, just leaving a note, ignoring his worried voice mails. But in the end it helped me. I went to see my mom, who explained to me everything what I already knew but it helped hearing it from her.

She is finally home, out of that awful asylum, we stay in contact now, and we have rekindled our relationship in a way. I managed to find my brothers ashes. My father buried the urn in our small garden block in the apartment building. I had a small burial with just me and my mother for Michael. He would have been proud, now I and my mother have a place to sit and talk to him.

Grissom found me after a couple of months with living with my mom. He had requested a leave of absences and got the first flight to San Francisco, the moment when I opened mom's door to see Grissom standing on the doorstep, I couldn't help but wrap my arms around him.

At that moment my life was complete. I was finally happy.

People say happiness doesn't last for long. And it's true. Whilst Grissom went back to work at the lab I decided it was better for me to stay with my mom. Grissom understood the idea but didn't like it. He left me because he knew I was happy. It was a couple of week after seeing Grissom that I got that dreadful phone call. Warrick had been killed. My friend who I loved dearly had been killed of a mob gangster. It didn't take me long to arrive at the crime lab and wait for Gil to come back. His face when I first saw him again was grief stricken, my heart tightening for him. Warrick was like a son to him. No he was a son to him. And with him gone, and Grissom having a moment of not trusting him had took all the light out of his beautiful blue eyes.

The funeral was agonizing but peaceful at the same time. I wanted to stay and help Grissom but both of us knew it wouldn't help us heal. So instead I flew back out to San Francisco leaving my only love behind to face his demons.

After a while back at my moms I decided to do some solo travelling. After explaining to Grissom the reasons and the whereabouts I'll be travelling he reluctantly agreed, promising he will come join me as soon as he can. I knew he wouldn't be joining me for a long while. He was tied to his job, he always had been.

So I travelled to Paris first. Since I was younger I had always wanted to see the Eiffel tower the Notre dame cathedral. And oh boy I loved it, I met some fantastic people and overall I was having a great time. I emailed Gil everyday telling him which famous landmarks I had seen and the people I met. He seemed happy for me but I knew something wasn't right with him. He was pulling away from me. I couldn't bare the thought of losing him.

After a while in Paris I decided to go to a little island off Brazil. I set up camp there and realise this was the place for me with the birds singing and the bugs reminding me of Gil I was content.

I started to worry when Grissom hadn't contacted me in over 3 weeks. I was prepared to fly out and see him despite me knowing I was probably not welcome back at the lab but once I knew Grissom was fine I would have come back.

I needn't have worried. One morning after a restless sleep, I was hanging my washing outside the tent when I heard footsteps behind me. I don't know how but I knew it was him and seeing him stood there in front of me, the straw hat I bought him one Christmas resting on his head, a camera in his hand and that big goofy smile across his face, I ran up to him and the kiss he gave me then was by far the best kiss I had ever gotten of him!

He explained everything what was going on back at the lab and how Langston was now the supervisor of the grave shift, by the sound of things the gang wasn't so pleased. I waited for him to finish with his story when I decided to ask him if he would be staying here with me. His answer made me feel utterly and totally complete.

But again things changed. Grissom got an opportunity to teach at a university and the lab had asked me if I could come back for a couple of month as they were short staffed.

I knew Grissom would feel at home teaching so I decided to give him what he wanted and I headed back to the city that never sleeps. Where not long ago I buried all my demons thinking I wouldn't be returning. To be honest I was scared of returning back to the lab. I thought the gang, my friends, my family, would hate me on how I abandoned them all but I shouldn't have worried they all welcomed me with open arms.

And here I am working back at Las Vegas crime lab. Surrounded by the people I love. Yes they has been some disturbing cases threatening my demons to come back but with Grissom only an hour's drive away I have kept them well and truly buried.

Grissom Is having a hard time on teaching don't get me wrong he loves it, but when he hears about the action going on in the field, I can tell he really wants to come back.

Who knows maybe one day both of us will be working at Las Vegas Crime lab again. Dr Gil Grissom and Mrs Sara Grissom working as partners fighting crime in the bright lights of sin city.

**The end.**

I was thinking if you guys liked this, I could do a Grissoms version ? Please review and let me know what you think :) THANKS FOR READING :)


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